Page 171

"And your brother, right. He was mine too." 

"But he still is, Papa! We are a whole family and we all love you, you know." 

"Everyone loves me and everyone leaves me. Even Miss Dora."

"But you know that since my father's death she has never wanted to spend a New Year with people. Not even with us children: she gives us a goodnight kiss and then a morning kiss, but at midnight she wants to be alone. With papa."

"Excuse me, please. I'm stupid." He crossed his arms, looked at the ceiling again and then said, "I'm stupid and I'm alone. Shit, shit and shit. Everyone cares about me. Even Mary." 

"Stop it Papa! Stop talking like that, you only do harm."

"I'm kind to her. I sleep with her, I try to please her... but she doesn't care." 

"She cares a lot. We all care about you." I lean over and kiss him on the forehead. "I love you Papa." 

"It's true?" 

"Of course it's true."

"I love you so much. I can never and will never love anyone as I love you. Please believe it and keep it in your heart." He sat up, adjusted the pillow. "How about a glass with me, partner?" 

I bend down to get the bottle. I fill the two glasses that are on the bedside table. "To your health; to yours and that of Mary and of the Finca and of the Pilar..."

"... to Adriana's health, to her poems and drawings and covers and her red blood cells..." 

"... to the book on the sea, to Black Dog, Negrita, the cats, Rene and Clara ..." 

"... A Calle sin Rimedio y Miss Dora y Gianfranco. How about a little 'mistake,' Daughter?"