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"Don't you understand? He was translating Across the River to Marcellina, who doesn't read English well..." 

"But why do you think it was Across the River?" 

"Because as soon as they saw me they suddenly fell silent and tried to hide the book and he passed it behind his back and then the book fell to the ground and Marcellina picked it up quickly and hid it in her purse. And when I sat with them, no one mentioned the book... it was really terrible!"

"But mum..." 

"Mum, mum... Just stop Adriana! Mum mum and then you see what mess you are up to? There are rules in life that must be respected. This is what happens when you go around with a married man . You are reaping what you deserve, but I cannot abandon you, as long as I have the strength I have to help you."

"What if we went away from Venice for a while?" 

"No. We're here now. And from now on you'll have the pleasure of leading the normal life of a normal girl, understand?"

Here, I'm doing something normal tonight. I thought putting on my silk dress: I'm going to the Avogadro's for lunch. It might not have been completely normal to skip breakfast, but Mum hadn't moved from her room anymore and my hunger was gone. Besides, there would be no one in the dining room: the aunts had left, Jackie was in Rome preparing for the competition and Gianfranco, well Gianfranco was far away and who knows when I would see him again.

Poor mom. She had also had too many worries after papa's death; and now I was getting into it too, without wanting to.

Without wanting to... I hadn't looked for, nor desired the love of Papa. He had loved me from the moment he had met me, across the river that day in the rain,...